The most downloaded episode of The Parenting Reframe is back. In this conversation — Albiona’s first interview with Joe Newman, author of Raising Lions — they dig into why strong-willed and defiant kids push back so hard, why giving more choices and more explanations makes it worse, and what actually works instead. Joe breaks down his break method (not a timeout — a fundamentally different approach), explains why children use conflict to ask questions rather than to misbehave, and shares the research showing that over-explaining produces more defiance, not less. He also walks through eggshell parenting, what kids who are driven by power need instead of approval, and why your child won’t take you seriously until your words have real weight behind them. If you have a strong-willed, defiant, or ADHD child and nothing seems to be working — start here.
This is the episode that started it all. The most downloaded conversation in the history of The Parenting Reframe — Albiona’s very first interview with Joe Newman, author of Raising Lions — is back. If you’ve never heard it, clear your schedule. If you have, get your notebook out because you’ll catch things you missed the first time.
Joe Newman has shaped Albiona’s work more than almost anyone else in this space. He doesn’t say what everyone else says. He doesn’t make it complicated. And this conversation — about why strong-willed kids need stronger boundaries, why your words have lost their weight, and what actually gets a defiant child to cooperate — is still one of the most useful hours you’ll spend as a parent.
Inside, they explore:
→ Why strong-willed and defiant kids aren’t broken — and why the accommodations most parents make are the exact opposite of what these kids need
→ The real reason children use conflict: it’s not about the blue bowl, the red cup, or the screen time — it’s a question they’re asking, and most parents are answering it wrong
→ How breaks work, why they’re not timeouts, and what to do when your child flatly refuses to take one — including what Joe did with a child who held out for 10 days straight
→ Why excess information and over-explaining are making defiance worse — and the research-backed reason that saying less produces a 50% drop in off-task behavior
→ What “eggshell parenting” is doing to strong-willed kids, why approval-based parenting fails power-seeking children, and how to stop parenting the child inside of you instead of the child in front of you
About Joe Newman:
Joe Newman is the author of Raising Lions and a behavior specialist with decades of experience working with defiant, strong-willed, and ADHD kids in schools, homes, and clinical settings. His approach combines psychoanalytic theory, cause-and-effect structure, and deep respect for children’s autonomy — and it works where other methods don’t.
Resources mentioned in this episode:
→ Get Raising Lions by Joe Newman
→ Visit Joe’s website — raisinglions.com
→ Joe’s YouTube channel — search “Raising Lions” for video demonstrations of his methods in action
Connect with Albiona:
→ Book a Free Discovery Call (1:1 Coaching) — https://www.theparentingreframe.com/coaching
→ Follow Albiona on Instagram — @theparentingreframe
→ Join Albiona’s Paid Substack Community — https://albiona.substack.com/
→ Email Albiona directly — albiona@theparentingreframe.com
Loved this episode?
Please rate, review, and share this one with a parent who’s exhausted by a strong-willed child and running out of ideas. This conversation has already reached thousands of families — and it deserves to reach thousands more.
Until next time,
Albiona 🤎