Feeling foggy, anxious, or completely unlike yourself after having a baby? You’re not losing your mind — you’re going through one of the most significant neurological shifts of your life. In this episode, Albiona sits down with Dr. Nicole Pensak, Harvard and Yale-trained clinical psychologist and author of Rattled: How to Calm New Mom Anxiety with the Power of the Postpartum Brain, to unpack what’s actually happening in the postpartum brain — and why the reframe matters. Dr. Nikki breaks down matrescence (the developmental phase of becoming a mother), the real science behind mom brain, how to recognize when you need support, and why “bouncing back” is the wrong goal entirely. She also shares the single most protective thing a partner can do in the first three months and practical steps every expecting parent should take before the baby arrives. Whether you’re pregnant, newly postpartum, or still processing the identity shift of motherhood years later — this conversation will make you feel seen, supported, and a whole lot less alone.
Inside, they explore:
→ What matrescence actually is — the neurocognitive developmental phase of becoming a mother — and why understanding it as an identity shift (not a breakdown) is the reframe new moms need most
→ The full picture of “mom brain”: why the forgetfulness is real, what the research actually shows about cognitive strengths postpartum, and why your brain deserves a lot more credit than it gets
→ How to tell the difference between normal postpartum adjustment and something that warrants support — and why Dr. Nikki’s answer is simpler than you think
→ The “bouncing back” myth: why the goal isn’t to return to who you were, and what it actually looks like to come through this developmental phase better than ever
→ Practical ways partners, family, and support systems can show up — including the single most protective thing a partner can do in the first three months
About Dr. Nicole Pensak:
Dr. Nicole Pensak is a Harvard and Yale-trained clinical psychologist certified in postpartum mental health and the author of Rattled: How to Calm New Mom Anxiety with the Power of the Postpartum Brain. Rattled was awarded Best Book for Parents by Zibby Owens, featured on Reese Witherspoon’s Hello Sunshine and The Bright Side Podcast, and named by Audible as a Most Anticipated Read 2025 in Well-Being. Dr. Pensak serves on the Expert Review Board of Parents Magazine and owns a private practice serving clients in NJ, NY, and 40+ states nationwide.
Resources mentioned in this episode:
→ Get Rattled by Dr. Nicole Pensak (now available in paperback and audiobook)
→ Visit Dr. Nikki’s website — www.drnicoleamoyalpensak.com
→ Follow Dr. Nikki on Instagram — @drnikkipensak
→ Fourth Tri Sanctuary — a postpartum support space for new moms mentioned by Albiona
Connect with Albiona:
→ Book a Free Discovery Call (1:1 Coaching) — https://www.theparentingreframe.com/coaching
→ Follow Albiona on Instagram — @theparentingreframe
→ Join Albiona’s Paid Substack Community — https://theparentingreframe.substack.com
→ Email Albiona directly — albiona@theparentingreframe.com
Loved this episode?
Please rate, review, and share this episode with a new mom, an expecting parent, or anyone in the thick of the fourth trimester. Postpartum anxiety and mom brain are still so misunderstood — the more this conversation travels, the more moms get the support they actually deserve.
Until next time,
Albiona 🤎